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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28649088">More Than Anything</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/stxrrycxs/pseuds/stxrrycxs'>stxrrycxs</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Bottom Dean Winchester, Chubby Dean Winchester, Cooking, Cuddling &amp; Snuggling, Homophobia, Homophobic John Winchester, Homophobic Language, Love Bites, M/M, Making Love, Morning Sex, Protective Castiel (Supernatural), Resurrected John Winchester, Secret Relationship, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, john winchester in the men of letters bunker</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 13:35:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,685</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28649088</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/stxrrycxs/pseuds/stxrrycxs</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>John Winchester is found resurrected while Sam is out on a run and Dean and Cas have to hide their relationship to keep each other safe.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Castiel/Dean Winchester</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>211</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>More Than Anything</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>please note: there is usage of the f slur in this fic, i am a gay male so i can say it. please don’t get mad at me skdhdjd</p><p>also, sorry if there’s any grammatical or spelling mistakes. auto-correct sometimes changes things i type and also i’ve been writing this for 9 hours non-stop with no one to correct stuff so apologies. enjoy</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sam breathes in and out with every step, jogging to the beat of the music playing in his ears as he admires the morning scenery, birds flying around and chirping, the light from the sunrise brushing the mountain peaks, and then the sudden bright white light coming from the trees to the left of him.</p><p>He stops immediately, grabbing a small knife from his pocket that he keeps with him at all times in case of sudden attacks like this. The hunter slowly walks up to the scene, moving some leaves from a bush aside before he feels his stomach drop at the sight before him, lying on the ground and groaning.</p><p>Sam starts rushing to the figure. “<i>Dad?</i>”</p><p>His blade falls to the grass beside him and he moves to help his father up. Before he knew what was happening, he’s being pushed to the ground, blade pointed on the back of his neck. Sam feels his heart start racing.</p><p>“Da-“</p><p>“Where am I? Where are Sam and Dean Winchester?” the man asks with a harsh I-take-no-shit tone.</p><p>“Y-You’re in Lebanon.. Lebanon, Kansas..” Sam mumbles into the grass.</p><p>“<i>Lebanon…</i>” John whispers in thought.</p><p>“And I-I’m Sam.. your son..” he feels his father stiffin.</p><p>“Bullshit, my son’s hair isn’t long like yours.”</p><p>“Well maybe that’s because it isn’t 2007 anymore,”</p><p>John’s blood runs cold. “And what do you mean by that?”</p><p>“Can you get off of me before I continue answering in dirt?”</p><p>John reluctantly gets off Sam, keeping the knife pointed towards him just in case. The younger of the two turns towards him, gesturing to his face with a sarcastic smile, dirt coating the left of him. His face drops with his hands.</p><p>“It’s 2021, you died fourteen years ago,” he says with a huff. “Dean and I live in a bunker now and found people to call family, <i>without you</i>.”</p><p>His father scoffs. “Wow, just wow.”</p><p>Sam’s face curls in confusion. “What?”</p><p>“Just- you,” he gestures his hands. “You‘ve grown so much. I see the demon blood never…”</p><p>Sam moves his jaw in annoyance. “Yeah, uh, Dean helped me out of that. If you want, I can show you to him. Show you how he’s doing and stuff.”</p><p>“Oh, uh, yeah sure. We don’t have to… walk, do we?”</p><p>Sam chuckles. “More time to let you in on what’s happened lately,”</p><p>—</p><p>Back at the bunker, behind closed doors, Dean and Cas are rocking together slowly. With Sam out on a run and Jack out working in heaven for the time being, they can be as loud as they want so they take any chance they can get.</p><p>“Cas, as much as I love this.. making love thing, why can’t we just go fast like all the other times,” Dean whines. He leans into Cas’s palm once it reaches his face.</p><p>“We haven’t done this yet, and we’ve been together for several months now. I figured it’d be good to have some kind of change.” He snaps his hips into Dean with a cheeky grin, knowing it caught the hunter off guard.</p><p>Dean grunts. “You asshole,” he says with a playful smile. </p><p>Castiel hums and brings his lips to Dean’s, running his fingers through his hair while using the other hand to hold his thigh. The angel relishes in the soft sounds coming from the human beneath him, leaving trails of wet sloppy kisses and love bites along his neck making Dean hum softly.</p><p>“I love you, Cas.”</p><p>“I love you too, Dean. More than anything.”</p><p>Dean blushes and scoffs, “Alright, no need to make it a competition,” The angel places a kiss on the corner of Dean’s mouth before rolling his hips against him harder, making the human moan softly against his lips.</p><p>Their lips meet once again, Cas’s tongue slipping into Dean’s mouth making them both groan in pleasure, the hunter’s leg’s wrapping around Castiel tighter.</p><p>They’re both interrupted by a knock on the door, causing their lips to separate almost immediately, turning to the door looking panicked. Dean whispers to Cas,</p><p>“<i>Did you lock the door?</i>”</p><p>Cas shakes his head, color drained from his face. “<i>No, I thought you did,</i>”</p><p>“<i>Shit.</i>”</p><p>“Dean? You there?” Sam reaches for the door handle, only to find it locked. Dean lets out a sigh of relief, seeing Cas’s hand lifted indicating a usage of his powers. “Dean?”</p><p>“Uh- Y-Yeah, I’m here Sammy. What’s up?” his voice sounds broken from embarrassment.</p><p>“Can I come in-?”</p><p>“No!” Dean exclaims. “Uh, no. My room’s a mess, I don’t want anyone seeing it right now,”</p><p>Sam looks to the side of Dean’s door, seeing Cas’s coat lying astray on the floor. He picks it up, an amused smirk joining his face. “And Cas is? His coat is literally right outside your door, Dean.”</p><p>Dean gives Cas a ‘What the fuck dude’ look as the angel hangs his head in embarrassment.</p><p>“Uh- He’s helping me.. with my room.”</p><p>“Uh-huh.” John gives Sam a confused look, making Sam gulp. “Uh- well, when you guys are.. done, me and da- me and a surprise will be in the library waiting,”</p><p>“Alright..” Dean’s words are muffled by his hands on his face.</p><p>“What was tha-“</p><p>“<i>I said alright!</i>” Dean yells, making Cas stifle a laugh. The hunter punches his arm.</p><p>There’s silence behind the door for several moments, before Cas speaks lowly. “They’ve gone. Can we please continue now?” he asks impatiently.</p><p>Dean nods his head rapidly. “Yes, please, so I can forget about Sam knowing we have sex now.”</p><p>“You think he knows?” Cas raises his eyebrows.</p><p>“I <i>know</i> he knows, I heard it in his voice when he brought up the coat. God this is embarrassing-“</p><p>“I apologize for the coat, it was my mistake.”</p><p>“It’s alright Cas, I don’t mind. Now can we hurry this up so Sam doesn’t suspect anymore shit we do,”</p><p>Castiel smirks and nods, diving down to leave deep red marks on his lover’s neck before bucking his hips.</p><p>—</p><p>“<i>‘Cas’?</i>” John asks.</p><p>“Oh, right, uh,” Sam uses his hands as he explains. “Cas, or <i>Castiel</i>, is an angel, and-“</p><p>“An <i>Angel?</i>” His father exclaims. “Those are real?”</p><p>“Yup, very. Though they aren’t what you’d expect, real assholes.”</p><p>“And.. <i>Castiel</i> isn’t?”</p><p>“Nope, he’s actually one of the very few good ones out there, or even alive.”</p><p>“Angel’s can die?”</p><p>“Oh yeah, most are dead. A few years ago there was a great fall because an angel named Metatron lied to C- to an angel, telling them he could fix heaven, when really he caused them all to fall. A lot died and now there’s only about a handful of ‘em left, Cas included.”</p><p>“Wow..”</p><p>“Yeah, a lot more has happened while you were gone. But I think it’s best we wait until Dean and Cas are here to explain more.” he mumbles the next words under his breath. “<i>Which may take some time…</i>”</p><p>“What was that?” John asks.</p><p>“Nothing, just talking to myself.”</p><p>His father huffs. “Another habit you picked up with me gone?” his voice indicates that he’s not happy with the things that have happened, with what they’ve done.</p><p>Sam’s about to respond before the lights flicker for a second, making him blush deeply. John immediately stands from his chair.</p><p>“The bunker is haunted? And you haven’t fixed it yet?” John’s voice is harsh, laced with anger and annoyance.</p><p>“Wh- No, no no no, it’s just an old bunker. Bad wiring. Dean plans on fixing it next time he has nothing to do, I swear. The bunker is safe, it even kept God away.”</p><p>“<i>God!?</i>” His father brings his hands to his hair, tugging at it. “What shit haven’t you boy’s gotten into?”</p><p>Before Sam could answer, he hears Dean and Cas talking down the hallway. He remembers their previous activities and rushes to them. He stifles a laugh at the amount of hicky’s on his brother’s neck.</p><p>“Uh, you’re gonna wanna get cleaned up.”</p><p>Dean’s face turns beet red before he pats his face and body to try and find any wet spots. “Cas, you didn’t-“</p><p>“No, I meant-“ Sam lowers his voice. “Your <i>necks</i>, genius.”</p><p>Dean’s mouth forms an ‘O’. “Cas, can you-?”</p><p>Cas groans and brings his fingers to Dean’s forehead, healing all of the love bites. “You do realize how much effort I put into those, right?”</p><p>“<i>Cas!</i>” Dean exclaims, blushing and punching the angel’s shoulder.</p><p>“What?” Castiel shrugs his shoulders, continuing to grumble.</p><p>Sam feels bile rise in his throat. “Alright.. well, I recommend you don’t do any lovey-dovey things in front of.. the surprise, alright?”</p><p>Dean groans. He plants a chaste kiss on Cas’s lips, one last show of affection before having to go cold turkey for who knows how long. Cas nudges his foot, giving him a glare that says <i>‘You’re being dramatic’</i> because the asshole had been reading his thoughts, again. “Fine, what is the surpise anyways?”</p><p>“You’ll see. Also, fix your hair. It’s kinda obvious what you‘ve been doing.”</p><p>Dean blushes and glares at Sam, running his fingers through his hair and slapping Cas’s hand away when he tries to help him. Castiel smiles, amused by his lover’s moodiness. He slaps Dean’s ass, and the hunter begins to regret informing Cas of couple things.</p><p>Dean stops dead in his tracks once he see’s the man sitting in one of the chairs, back straightening. Cas notices and brings his eyes to where Dean’s lie, and freezes as well. John Winchester, back from the dead.</p><p>“Dad..” Dean says quietly in disbelief. “How… How did you get here…” he looks to Sam. “How did you find him?”</p><p>“I.. I don’t know, I mean I was just on my usual morning jog when I saw a bright light. I went towards it and.. there he was,” Sam says with a shrug.</p><p>“Oh..” Dean gulps, trying his best to calm himself. That’s why Sam was so adamant on Dean and Cas not acting lovingly, why they had to heal the hicky’s. Because John would find out. “Wow.. um.. this is…”</p><p>“Are you Castiel?” John’s voice is loud, the sudden sound making Dean almost flinch. <i>Of course,</i> Dean thinks. <i>He’s not going to listen to me.</i></p><p>Castiel nods, standing straight and giving John a cold and curious glare. “I am,” Dean can tell he’s getting defensive of him. He knows what John has done, he’s seen Dean’s memories and has been told about what he’s done to Dean, several times. “And you’re John Winchester, Sam and Dean’s father.”</p><p>“Indeed. So.. you‘ve been fighting with them for how long?”</p><p>“Nearing twelve years, now.”</p><p>“Alright. Has Dean softened up at all?”</p><p>“Excuse me?” Cas’s voice is clear with offense, and Dean can feel the anger radiating off of him. He wishes he were able to touch him, rub his back or arm to help him calm down.</p><p>“You know, has he tried settling down or giving up on the job or anything like that?”</p><p>“If you mean have I-“ Dean’s cut off immediately by John’s harsh voice.</p><p>“Quiet, boy. I’m not speaking to you. But it seems like my question was answered already.”</p><p>Dean feels terror flood his system, hands flat at his sides. “Yes sir, sorry sir.” Castiel steps in front of Dean, and the hunter feels his heart drop.</p><p>“Don’t talk to him like that.” The angel orders.</p><p>“Like what? Dean, are you really so weak now that you need someone to protect you?”</p><p>Cas is about to talk back before Dean pushes him out of the way, trying to glare at Cas but his eyes are only filled with fear. “<i>I don’t-</i>” he huffs, straightening himself up before looking to his father with hard eyes. “I don’t need someone to protect me, sir,” he can almost feel Cas’s hurt. All the way’s he’s going to apologize to him later are racing through his head.</p><p>John almost see’s through his mask. “Good, I don’t want any of you boys going soft on me,” he sits up from the chair. “Now, who’s going to grab me a beer?”</p><p>Dean raises his finger. “I will.” he sends a quick prayer to Cas. <i>Please say you’re going to join me.</i></p><p>He see’s Cas soften as he gets the prayer. “I’ll join you,” he says coldly, glaring at John. The two walk out of the room together, leaving Sam and John to be alone awkwardly.</p><p>Sam intakes a sharp breath. “Cas isn’t very good with new people,” he says with a weak laugh. John gives him a blank reaction.</p><p>Once out of earshot, Dean collapses against the hallway wall. “I’m sorry Cas, I didn’t want to be rude to you back there I just-“</p><p>Cas sits down next to him, placing a hand in Dean’s hair to play with it, knowing it calms him down. “It’s alright Dean, I understand. I know what your father did and how you act around him. It’s nothing to apologize for,”</p><p>Dean looks to him with guilt in his eyes. “Are you sure?”</p><p>The angel smiles at him lovingly. “Of course.” Dean smiles back.</p><p>“Okay,” he relishes in the calming feeling of Cas’s fingers playing with his hair. He lets out a hum before getting up, holding Cas’s hand as he does so. “We need to get those beers before we’re suspected of anything.”</p><p>Cas nods and stands with him, kissing Dean’s knuckles as they walk to the kitchen, making the hunter smile.</p><p>Once they enter the kitchen together Dean feels himself calm down some more, being in a location he has good memories of with the man he loves. He hops onto the counter and sighs. He needs to take a breather. The hunter’s caught off guard when Cas walks between Dean’s legs, hands on his hips and lips meeting his. Dean feels himself soften at the very action. The heels of his shoes touch the back of Cas’s clothed thighs.</p><p>Once they pull away Dean lets out a sigh of content. “Thank you..”</p><p>Cas places a kiss on Dean’s cheek. “It’s nothing,” his hand is placed on his other cheek. “It looked like you were still stressed, I don’t want you doing anything rash around your father.”</p><p>Dean laughs. “You’re one to talk, Mr. Cold,” Cas gives him a look of confusion. “If you continue to be like that to my dad, as much as I appreciate it, he’s going to hate you or think you’re planning something. I know him, he’s a nut and will find himself convinced you’re trying to kill me or something.”</p><p>“Well, to be honest I think he had already hated me.” Cas says quietly against Dean’s jaw as he places another kiss. The human smiles as he rubs his chin against Cas’s, stubble scratching his face in a comforting way. He lets out a breath of relief.</p><p>“Maybe.”</p><p>—</p><p>John taps his foot impatiently. “Why are they taking so long?”</p><p>Sam shrugs. “Dunno, maybe they got caught up in something,”</p><p>“Like what?” John scowls.</p><p>“Spider? How should I know, Dean’s always getting distracted by things.”</p><p>The old man huffs. “You notice something weird about that angel?”</p><p>“What? Cas? He’s always been weird, you should have seen him when we first met him,” Sam chuckles. “Dean helped him become more.. human, I guess you could say. Cas used to be kind of emotionless and wouldn’t get any jokes we made. Now he’s one of the kindest people we’ve met, if not the. He’s given up a lot of things for us, you know?”</p><p>He groans. “Enough with the sappy crap, I’m talking about him being.. you know..”</p><p>Sam’s face turns in confusion. “I.. know?”</p><p>“Is he.. <i>gay?</i>” John asks with a face of disgust. Sam’s blood runs cold.</p><p>“What.. what makes you think that?”</p><p>“I dunno, he gives off that vibe. But you and your brother wouldn’t let a queer in here, would you?”</p><p>Sam tries to hide a laugh. The amount of times they’ve failed that… “Uh, n-no, we haven’t. Except for, well, one…”</p><p>John goes stern. “You what, boy?”</p><p>Sam glares at John. “If it makes you feel any better, she died six years ago. I don’t see why it’d be a problem anyways, there’s nothing wrong with it.”</p><p>“Like hell there is!” John booms. He gets up from his chair and storms towards the hallway that leads to the kitchen.</p><p>“Where are you going?” Sam asks in a worried voice.</p><p>“I’m going to make sure that angel isn’t making my son into a <i>faggot</i>.”</p><p>Sam feels sick. His eyes dodge over the table in front of him in thought before he grabs his phone.</p><p>—</p><p>Dean hums against Castiel’s lips, his hands resting on the angel’s neck while Cas’s continue to rest on his hips. Dean groans when he hears his phone go off and pulls away from the angel.</p><p>“Hold on, sorry,” Dean says in annoyance. Cas nods in understanding, running one of his hands up and down Dean’s thigh, thumb occasionally running in circles. The called ID says “Sam”. He raises the phone to his ear “What?”</p><p>“Dean dad is on his way there right now so if you and Cas are making out you need to stop right now.” Dean’s blood runs cold.</p><p>He shoves Cas away from him and jumps off the counter, thanking Sam before hanging up quickly.</p><p>Cas looks to Dean in confusion. “What was that for?” he sees Dean rubbing his mouth and neck with his sleeve.</p><p>“<i>My dad-</i>” he whispers. He’s interrupted by the sound of boots storming down the hall. Cas copies Dean’s actions before leaning against the counter.</p><p>John enters the room swiftly, face red with anger. “Why are you taking so long, boy?”</p><p>Dean feels guilt hit him once again. His short moment with Cas was, well, just that. Short. It helped him for a small time.</p><p>“We-“</p><p>“Don’t get mad at him, we got distracted,” Cas said gruffly.</p><p>“Oh yeah? Doing what exactly.”</p><p>“Talking.”</p><p>“About what.”</p><p>“Personal things that are of no buisness to you, now if you could excuse us, we’re going to bring you <i>our</i> beers.”</p><p>Dean turns to the fridge, blood running to his cheeks and other places at Cas’s defensiveness of him. He grabs four beer’s from the fridge and hands two to Cas to hold. Cas walks up to John with confidence, handing him his beer. They both glare at each other.</p><p>“Alright, rulers away,” Dean says after a cough. “We can’t leave Sammy alone for too long or he might make a bomb again,”</p><p>He tugs on Cas’s coat to drag him out of the room, and the angel follows. He offers his free hand to Dean to take one of the beers as they walk, making John raise an eyebrow.</p><p>Soon enough they make it to the library, Dean talking about one of the times Sam made a bomb in science class and had to leave the school the whole way to try and brighten the mood. John was surprised to see Castiel smile and hear him laugh. The pit in his stomach grows.</p><p>Sam looked like he was waiting to see a corpse when they arrived, relief clear on his face once he saw Dean and Cas alive and in one piece. Dean pats the angel’s back and gives a weary look to Sam, mouthing a ‘thank you’ for saving their asses. His brother nods.</p><p>John glares holes into the back of Cas’s head as he drinks his beer, watching the angel like a hawk. Castiel is only observing his beer, reading the label. It’s a thing he likes doing for some reason, Dean finds it cute. Once Cas notices the staring, though, he glares back at the man. The cap of his beer pops off from the little wave of his finger, making John slightly nervous. Cas notices the anxious feeling from him and smirks in amusement, happy to know that he has a way to scare the Winchester if it comes to it.</p><p>Dean notices the staring and looks to his wrist to check the time, giving a dramatic “Wow, look at the time!” despite it only being 11am. “Cas, wanna go watch that movie?” He grabs Cas’s arm to try and drag him away but his father stops him before he could go too far.</p><p>“Dean, stop avoiding me. Why don’t you want to talk to your own father?” Dean stops in his tracks, grip tightening on Cas’s arm. “You’re not even going to give me a thank you? I saved your life last time we saw each other, and I haven’t gotten a single word of thanks around here-“</p><p>“Yeah well maybe it’s because you only sacrificed yourself for your own benifit, dad,” Dean barks out. Sam and Cas’s faces drop.</p><p>“Excuse me?”</p><p>“<i>Okay!</i>” Sam exclaims, stepping between them. “Why don’t we give dad a run-down on what’s happened over the last fourteen or whatever years, yeah?”</p><p>Dean looks to Sam nervously and angrily before nodding. “Fine, just.. give me a few minutes. Cas,” he says before walking out again, the angel following closely behind him with a scowl.</p><p>Once they made it into the hallway away from them, Dean lets out a deep breath. He softens at the feeling of Cas’s hand on his shoulder, smiling at the shoulder he picked, his left. It’s always the same shoulder with him. </p><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine,” he says quietly. “Just.. I’ve never really talked back to him before so I know this won’t go well…”</p><p>Cas brings him into a hug. “I’ll be there right beside you, alright? If you ever need any reassurance, you can send me a prayer or squeeze my hand, anything.”</p><p>“Thank you, Cas..” he mumbles into his neck. The smell of old books brings him comfort, he’s found.</p><p>“Of course. Now, we need to get back there,” he pulls away from Dean. “I don’t want to have to deal with your brother and father at each other’s necks as well,”</p><p>“Or, you know, my dad suspecting anything.”</p><p>“Right, that too,” Cas chuckles. Dean smiles at him warmly.</p><p>“I love you, Cas.” he says softly.</p><p>Castiel smiles back. “I know, you told me that this morning,” Dean rolls his eyes. “I love you too, Dean.”</p><p>“More than anything?” the hunter smirks.</p><p>Cas laughs softly at Dean remembering his words before planting a kiss on his forehead. “Yes, more than anything.”</p><p>The human rests his head on Cas’s neck, swaying against him slightly before sighing and pulling away. “Can we please have a big cuddle session once we’re done with all this? All this.. dad coming back from the dead stuff is extremely exhausting..”</p><p>The angel smiles. “Of course, I would love that.”</p><p>A huff of relief. “Good, now let’s get back to them, we’ve taken long enough.” He pecks Cas’s lips before starting to walk down the hallway, holding the angel’s hand with his own subconsciously.</p><p>Cas brings their hands up, peppering kisses on each of Dean’s knuckles, making him chuckle. “Why do you like kissing my hands so much?”</p><p>“Is it a problem?”</p><p>“Well, no.. It’s just.. I’ve never seen people do it before,”</p><p>“Well then those are boring people,” Cas says with a smile. “I thought that me kissing your hands would be comforting to you, but if that’s not the case then I can stop-“</p><p>“What? No, no you’re fine. It is.. kind of comforting, now that I come to think about it, I’ve just never seen people do it all that much. Or, at all.” he says with a nervous laugh.</p><p>Cas smiles at him before reaching for Dean’s other hand, eyes fluttering closed before placing a soft kiss on his palm. “Then I’ll be your first person,”</p><p>Dean’s cheeks tint red at that and he turns back down the hall with a smile wide across his face. “You’re somethin’, Cas, you know that?” Cas returns the smile.</p><p>Soon enough they make it to the library again, hands since departed. They walk up with the smiles still on their faces, but those soon fade once John points them<br/>
out. Dean and Cas both sit beside each other at the table, hands underneath and out of sight..</p><p>Sam clears his throat. “So, who’s going first?”</p><p>—</p><p>After an agonizing 5-hour long explaining session, Dean and Cas are finally allowed leave and immediately head to their room. As soon as Cas closes the door Dean starts stripping down, trying to get into bed as soon as possible.</p><p>Once the door is locked, Castiel starts stripping down as well. Unlike Dean who just threw his clothes into a corner, Cas neatly folds his clothes on his chair and placed his shoes underneath. As soon as he crawls under the covers Dean wraps his arms around Cas like a koala. The angel chuckles at the action and turns over so he could face him.</p><p>“Hi,” Dean says with a smile.</p><p>“Hello, Dean,” Cas returns.</p><p>“Can we please hug each other till we die of old age now.” the human whines, nuzzling into Cas’s chest.</p><p>“Well, until you die of old age.” he corrects.</p><p>Dean’s chest hurts as he remembers that fact. Cas doesn’t age, he’s not human. He’ll have to watch him<br/>
die and grow old and sickly, while he remains young and pure forever, no health complications. He doesn’t say anything, he just holds Cas harder, suddenly interested in not taking his time with him for granted.</p><p>“Dean?” Cas asks worriedly.</p><p>“Yeah?” Dean mumbles into his chest.</p><p>“Are you alright?” Dean hums. Cas sighs. “What’s wrong, I know you’re upset. Did I say something wrong?”</p><p>He shakes his head, pressing his face into Cas’s neck wishing he’d just drop the topic. He wanted a cuddle session, not a therapy session.</p><p>“Don’t lie to me, Dean. Tell me what’s wrong,”</p><p>The hunter huffs and pulls away from Cas slightly, still wrapped in each other’s arms. “It’s just.. I realize that you won’t be able to grow old with me, you’re gonna have to watch me become all crippled and sick while you stay young and fine. My hair will turn grey and fall out while yours will stay soft and brown. You know?” Cas frowns, bringing a hand up to cup his face. “I just.. I don’t want you to feel sad knowing that I’m dying.. that I’m not the same anymore, that I’m different…” he takes in a sharp breath. “I don’t want you to not love me anymore…”</p><p>Cas feels his heart break. “What..? Dean, no-“ he feels tears prick his eyes as he brings his forehead to Dean’s. “Dean, I’m never going to stop loving you. Ever. No matter what happens, I’m still going to always love you. That’s never going to change, okay?” Dean looks to their pillows. “If your hair turns grey and falls out, I won’t mind. Even if it means I won’t be able to play with it, I can wait until you make it to heaven. I don’t mind. I’ll still hold you, I’ll still take care of you, I’ll still kiss you and your lips and your hands and I’ll still, above all, love you.” He brings their lips together. “Walking cane and all. Okay?”</p><p>He pulls away from Dean to look at him and feels worry lines form on his forehead. “Oh- Dean, please don’t cry I’m sorry..” he wipes away Dean’s tears with his thumb, then wrapping him in his arms and holding him close. He feels the hunter shake against him, struggling to keep down his sobs. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make you cry…”</p><p>“N-No, Cas it’s..” a sob escapes his lips. “No one’s e-ever said that to m-me before a-and…”</p><p>Castiel nods in understanding before leaving a soft, loving kiss on his forehead. “I can say it again if you’d like,”</p><p>Dean laughs and shakes his head, “No, no, d-don’t, please,” he nuzzles against Cas’s neck. “I’ll start crying harder, please don’t,”</p><p>Cas chuckles and nod’s. “Okay,”</p><p>Soon enough Dean’s breathing even’s out and he falls asleep, leaving Cas alone tangled with him.</p><p>He takes the time to focus on his breathing, and takes Dean’s words into consideration. Of course he’s still going to still love him, he will always love Dean. He wasn’t lying there. But what will he do? Eventually he’ll have to take care of Dean where he’s at a point of not being able to get out of bed. He’ll have to help him with his back pains, help him through coping with health problems, his hair falling out and losing it’s beautiful golden shine, when his skin becomes sensitive and near paper thin, more prone to bruises and cuts.</p><p>Eventually Dean will feel guilty about his appearance, what his body does and how Cas will have to help him through those. Castiel himself doesn’t care about what he has to do for Dean, he’ll always do anything for him. But he worries about what his lover will think. He doesn’t want him to feel self-conscious about himself, or embarrassed. He doesn’t want Dean to worry about Cas thinking of him differently as he changes, because he really won’t. Dean’s soul and personality is beautiful to him and that’s all that matters, nothing will ever take that from him.</p><p>His thoughts are interrupted by a knock at the door.</p><p>“Dean? Cas? You in there?” It’s Sam.</p><p>Cas bites his lip and attempts to cover Dean’s ears as to not wake him up.</p><p>“Are you alone?” Cas asks loud enough for Sam to hear but quiet enough for Dean to at-most stir to.</p><p>“Yeah, don’t worry my dad is in a room several halls down.” The door clicks from Cas unlocking it using his grace and Sam walks in, closing it behind him quietly once he notices Dean asleep next to the angel.</p><p>“What’s wrong?”</p><p>Sam doesn’t answer him at first. “You really help him, don’t you?”</p><p>Cas looks to Dean and smiles. “I believe so, he rarely has nightmares anymore due to me sleeping with him now,”</p><p>“That’s good. I’m glad he finally has someone like you, I’m sure you know how he grew up and what was drilled into his brain,”</p><p>The angel nods. “I am aware, I wish I were there to help prevent that. What Dean’s gone though… no one deserves that, no one deserves to have gone through what he has. I try my best to remind him of how much I love him, as often as I can,” He laughs softly. “In fact, I think I went a little too far this time, he started crying…”</p><p>Sam laughs a little too loud at Cas’s words, immediately freezing and going quiet when Dean stirs in his sleep and wraps around Cas tighter. </p><p>Sam sighs. “But really, I’m really glad you’re here for him. I’ve never been good at helping him through stuff so I’m glad you’re able to do that. And I know that.. my father isn’t accepting of this kind of stuff, especially if it means Dean’s happy, but don’t listen to the stupid shit he says,” Cas smiles at his words. “You’re good for Dean, you really are. I know you love him a lot and I trust you to take care of and help him,”</p><p>“Thank you, Sam.”</p><p>“It’s nothing. Also,” Sam’s cheeks go red. “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m going to take my dad to town tomorrow for a few hours so if you and Dean want some.. alone time…”</p><p>Cas blushes. “Oh.. um.. thank you, alright…”</p><p>“I’ll let you know when we’re about to leave-“ Sam runs a hand through his hair. “You know what, I’ll go now. I’m sure you want to be alone with Dean right now, and I know that he’s going to sleep for ages, so goodnight Cas.”</p><p>“Good.. night, Sam.”</p><p>Sam leaves the room and closes the door behind him, Cas locking it once again. Dean whines in his sleep and nuzzle’s into Cas’s neck. The angel leaves a kiss in his hair and runs his fingers through absent mindedly, which he usually does as Dean sleeps.</p><p>“Goodnight, Dean,”</p><p>—</p><p>The next morning Sam knocks on their door, and Cas looks from the ceiling to the door. “We’re about to head out, call us if you need anything.”</p><p>“Have a good time, Sam,”</p><p>“L.. uh, likewise…”</p><p>They walk away and Cas turns to Dean, who’s strewn across his chest and currently leaving a drool puddle he’ll surely apologize over a million times for once he wakes up. The angel admires the freckles that litter Dean’s arms and back, trailing them with his fingers until he eventually groans and tightens his arms around Cas, letting out a huff against his chest.</p><p>“Goodmorning, Beloved,” Cas greets with a smile.</p><p>Dean only grumbles and sits up, rubbing his eyes. He stretches out his back with a crack and a moan of relief before meeting his hands to his lips, groaning once he finds dried drool there. He turns back to Cas and notices the the small pool there.</p><p>“Ah shit,” Cas simply chuckles and uses his grace to rid of it. The angel rolls over and places a kiss on Dean’s lips. Dean sighs and kisses back, lips moving together for a good ten seconds before pulling away. “Mornin’, Cas,”</p><p>“Sam’s out in town with your father, they’ve just left and will be out for some hours. The bunker is all ours,”</p><p>Dean hums, wearing a playful grin. “Oh yeah?”</p><p>“Mhm,” he nuzzles their noses together. “No one to interrupt us for several hours,”</p><p>Cas brings his hand to Dean’s thigh, lifting it to wrap around his waist. The hunter chuckles and brings Cas to another kiss, helping hoist his leg around his hip. The angel rolls over, placing himself above Dean so they could position themselves better. Cas grinds onto Dean, making them both moan. He leaves little bites on Dean’s neck as he rocks his hips, causing the human to hum.</p><p>Dean bites Cas’s shoulder hard, stunning the angel and causing him to draw back, giving him a confused look. “What was that for?”</p><p>“If you make me cream my pants like a teenager you’re going to sleep on the couch tonight.”</p><p>“You mean the chair.”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“And you couldn’t have just told me this without biting me.”</p><p>“I wanted to see what all the fun was about,” Dean shrugs. A blush reaches Cas’s cheeks. Realization hits Dean. “Wait…” He blushes harder. “Do you.. have a possession kink, Cas..” no response. “I’m not talking demon or angel possession, I mean marks, bruises, scratches, just any type go mark of possession,”</p><p>The angel looks away from Dean in embarrassment. “No..”</p><p>“Oh my God you do,” Dean says in disbelief, an amused smile on his face. “That’s why you love marking me up, huh? Well, I hate to break it to ya Cas but I don’t expect anyone to be trying to flirt with me any time soon,”</p><p>Cas groans and leans back down, leaving a hard bite on Dean’s neck, drawing blood. Dean gasps at the action and feeling, He feels more little bites being left across his neck, his collar bone and even his jaw.</p><p>“Alright, Cas, I think you’ve left enough. Now can we please get to the fucking already because I’m getting impatient,”</p><p>“Fine,” Cas takes his pajamas and boxers off and throws them off the side of the bed, Dean copying him.</p><p>The angel grabs lube from their bedside table and squirts some into his hand. He throws it to the pillow and coats one of his fingers in the liquid before slowly pressing it into Dean, who grunts at the feeling. Thankfully prep would be easier due to yesterday morning’s activities.</p><p>After working through three fingers, Cas lubes himself up and starts pushing into Dean slowly, rubbing his thigh as he does so and letting out words of encouragement and praise to him. Dean acts like he hates the praise coming from Cas, but really he loves it so much and he doesn’t know why.</p><p>“You’re so good Dean, you’re doing so good,” Cas whispers into the hunter’s ear as he continues to slowly push into him.  Dean let’s out a whine of pleasure as he feels himself get stretched out more, the words from Cas making him feel warm all over. “So good, Dean,”</p><p>Their lips meet once Cas has been fully pushed into Dean. The human moans against him once Castiel starts moving, pulling in and out slowly but just fast enough. </p><p>“Cas..” the hunter moans softly.</p><p>“You’re so beautiful, Dean,” he breathes against Dean’s lips. “So beautiful, you’re so good for me..”</p><p>“Faster, please…”</p><p>“Be patient, my love,” he nibbles on Dean’s ear, lifting Dean up by his thighs to push into him deeper, causing him to let out a gasp of surprise.</p><p>Dean’s set at a weird angle, shoulders and head on the bed but hips being held up by Cas. He can feel his back hurting already. He’s getting too old for this stuff.</p><p>Slowly but surely, Castiel picks up speed, and eventually they’re moving together quickly, Cas fucking Dean into the mattress roughly after he had begged and begged. Dean let’s out loud moans of pleasure as he’s spread apart, back being bent with Cas leaning forward and leaving dark hicky’s along his neck.</p><p>“<i>Cas, fuck…</i>” Dean gasps against his angel’s lips.</p><p>“You’re-“ he grunts. “You’re so beautiful, Dean,” he leaves a sloppy kiss on his lover’s lips, tired pants leaving them both. “You’ve done so good, you’re so good for me…”</p><p>“<i>I l’y somch</i>,” Dean mumbles.</p><p>“What’d you s-say, Dean?” Cas asks, mouthing Dean’s throat.</p><p>“I l-love you, Ca-“ a moan escapes past his lips once again.</p><p>Cas hums and brings his lips to Dean’s again, sliding his tongue in and moaning as Dean sucks on it. He feels the hunter’s nails claw at his back as he lets out a muffled moan of his name, driving into his sweet spot. Cas brings a hand to Dean’s dick, rubbing it a few times to see his reaction before using his grace, sending a shock of pleasure through him from there and making him release instantly, moaning Cas’s name loudly.</p><p>Dean has tears running down the side of his face as he pants, sobs leaving his lips as he comes down from the high, overwhelmed with the sudden occurrence. Castiel continues to move in and out of Dean at a rapid pace, speeding up before releasing into the hunter and rolling his hips a few more times before collapsing onto him.</p><p>The sound of their pants fill the room before Dean punches Cas’s arm. “The hell was that for?” He asks breathlessly. “You just had to use your grace, huh?”</p><p>Cas chuckles above him before kissing him deeply, humming and nodding as a yes. He pulls out of Dean to plant a kiss on his belly, making Dean blush a deep red. He’s become more bloated over the last few months and Cas hasn’t stopped pointing out how much he loves the chub, whether that be mentioning it or kissing it.</p><p>Dean grumbles. “Can we make breakfast already?”</p><p>“Of course, just give me a few minutes,” he sighs and rag dolls on top of Dean, exhausted. “You did great, Dean,”</p><p>The hunter blushes. “Thank you… you.. you too…?”</p><p>Cas smiles.</p><p>—</p><p>Dean hums as he pours pancake batter into a pan, creating an almost perfect circle. He can’t help but let out a whistle. “Look at that, I’m amazing aren’t I?”</p><p>“Yes, yes you are,” Cas says with a smile, walking up behind Dean and wrapping his arms around his waist, leaving a kiss on the nape of his neck. Dean leans into the touch and hums.</p><p>The hunter elbows Cas to get him away before grabbing the spatula, pushing it under the pancake and flipping it, revealing a perfect golden-brown underside. Dean beams. “Awh yes!”</p><p>He then makes a few more pancakes, some bacon and some scrambled eggs. Sure, it’s a cheesy breakfast, but he woke up with the day starting well, so why not let yourself go with a cliche breakfast every once-and-awhile. After placing all the plates on the table, Dean turns to Cas, who somehow has flour on his shirt and in his hair.</p><p>“Dude.. we didn’t even use flour, we used a pancake mix and you didn't even touch it, you…” Cas shrugs and Dean just smiles.</p><p>The hunter walks over to Cas and places a kiss on his lips, lifting his chin up with his fingers. Before he knew it, he was being hoisted up onto the counter with Cas between his legs, peppering kisses along his neck and leading to his lips. Dean’s giggles echo down the hallway as Cas runs his fingers along his stomach, tickling him.</p><p>“S-Stop,” Dean laughs as the angel nibbles at his neck playfully and continues to run his hands up his shirt. “Cas, stop it-“</p><p>They don’t hear the sounds of footsteps running down the halls over the joyous sounds Dean’s making.</p><p>“Cas if you don’t stop right now I will pour this bowl of batter over your head,” he says playfully before bringing their lips together.</p><p>“Well then we’d both have to take a shower, now wouldn’t we?”</p><p>“You already <i>do</i>. Seriously, how the hell did you get flour on you?”</p><p>Cas hums and runs a hand along Dean’s thigh, moving their lips together deeply and letting out occasional sounds.</p><p>Dean finally breaks them apart to speak. “I need to call Sam to ask him when he’ll get here, I spent ages making this food and I don’t want it going cold,”</p><p>“You spent thirty minutes on it.”</p><p>“Well sorry <i>Mr. Im-eight-billion-years-old</i>, thirty minutes is quite a lot to us humans,”</p><p>“I’ve been human and it’s really not,” Cas chuckles.</p><p>“Can you work with me here, please,” Dean rolls his eyes and places a kiss on Cas’s lips.</p><p>On the other side of the door, in the hallway, John and Sam stand outside in silence. Sam stares at his father with worry, giving a silent plead to not do anything. But, of course he’d never listened to anyone.</p><p>John pushes past Sam and storms into the kitchen, looking furious. Dean, who was just moments before smiling like the happiest man on earth, now has a terrified face, drained of color. Cas immediately picked Dean off the counter and put him behind him to protect him from any harm.</p><p>“You..” John points to Cas. “You turned my son into a <i>queer?!</i>”</p><p>Cas doesn't say anything, he just glares at John with warning clear in his eyes. He can feel Dean shaking behind him.</p><p>“And Sam, you knew about this? You knew about what this.. what this <i>freak</i> had done to your brother?” Cas grows tense from the nickname. “And you didn’t tell me?” He turns back around to the couple, looking at Dean. “I always knew you were gonna end up a <i>faggot,</i> Dean. When you were with that boy when you were in high school… I told you it was just a phase but deep down I knew you’d do it again. And now here you are,” he gestures to Cas. “You’re getting fucked by a fallen angel. How does that make you feel, huh? Are you this angel’s bitch? His boy toy, is that it-?”</p><p>“<i>Stop!</i>” Dean exclaims, moving out from behind Cas. “I’m not his bitch, or his boy toy, and he’s not using me! He actually <i>genuinely</i> loves me, way more than you could ever even begin to imagine what love might even look like,” he huffs. “Sure, I get fucked by him, but you know what? It’s <i>great</i>. So you can go shove your stupid homophobic opinion right up your ass, you understand that?” He points to Cas. “Cas taught me that I’m actually worth way more than you raised me to believe, he actually shows his love for me instead of just saying it, which, <i>you never even did!</i>” Dean then points to the table of food. “Now I made you some fucking breakfast because I thought maybe, just maybe, you’d try and be a good person and father in the brand new year of 2021, but I guess not. So you can sit down, shut up and enjoy your food or get the fuck out of here because I surely would not mind the latter at <i>all</i>.”</p><p>Cas pulls Dean back to his side and cups his face, asking him if he’s okay. Dean nods but doesn’t take his eyes off his father, who appears to be seething with anger. Cas joins him, glaring at the Winchester’s father. </p><p>John glares at his son, questions like ‘what did I do wrong’ racing through his mind. He huffs. “In for a penny,” and throws a punch at Dean. Or at least tries, because Cas catches it almost immediately with an iron grip. Dean feels his heart flutter at how fast he was to protect him.</p><p>His hand crunches as Cas forces him to the ground, squeezing his hand. The cries of pain turn into laughter as John looks up at Cas, who wears a stoic face. “All you queers are the same..” but before he could elaborate, the angel knees him in the face, knocking him out.</p><p>Cas turns to Dean and kisses his forehead. “Do you wish to eat now?”</p><p>Dean bites his lip and says “Just one thing,” before landing a kick to his father’s gut. Dean feels an extremely heavy weight lift off his shoulders, allowing him to feel like he can finally breathe. “Okay, we can eat now.”</p><p>Sam looks at the two of them in disbelief before attempting to drag their father outside of the bunker, leaving Dean and Cas alone to make sappy comments about each other.</p><p>“I love you Cas, a whole ton,” Dean says as his eyes meet Cas’s.</p><p>“I know, I love you too. More than anything,” the angel brings his lip’s to Dean’s, savoring the taste of syrup on his tongue.</p>
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